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Monday, September 30, 2013

Looking Good!

My partner is editing one of my new books and she told me that she forgot to do some editing and was just reading so she had to go back and look over a chapter again. I think that's a great sign! She forgot to edit because she was into the story. That made me happy!

All an author wants is to know that people enjoy their work. I've had lots of compliments on my first book and it's only the beginning of the tales I'm going to spin! I actually have two complete books (that need to be edited). I can't wait to get one out there so I can start prepping the second one. They're so fun! I need to contact my cover art guy and get him to start working. I sent him my author page but he wanted more information. (author page:

Looking forward to NaNoWriMo this November! Really can't wait!!


Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Writing with a timetable

I've got a crick in my neck already from writing -- it isn't even 9:30 am! I did start early though. It seems that the whole second part of my book is getting a rewrite because I wasn't careful enough the first go-round. Taught me a lesson. Next book is going to get laid out and planned. Sheesh. This has turned in to a bigger project that I'd expected. I thought I could zoom through part 2 of the book, but it just wasn't to be. Shoulda known better.

Watched Iron Man 3 last night. What a great movie. All of the actors are excellent and it is so exciting all the way through it. And what a well told story. So that's my short-take on Iron Man. He rocks.

I've had friends suggest that I turn my Eyes of the Witch series into a movie screenplay. I've heard that it's easier to write a screenplay than it is a novel, but the novel is so much more enticing to me. A screenplay, however, would bring in the cash where as with the books I've barely made a profit so far. Not that I'm complaining. I love to write and this is what I do.

Back to work now. More to come soon -- hopefully news of my novel being in a second edit and I'll have this rewrite complete!

Love & Hugs,

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Email is a Waste of Time

I had 64 new messages and probably 3 of them I cared about. I've tried getting of mailing lists but it's just a pain in the ass. I hate email. If you want to tell me something, call me or text me. Really!

I'm still working on editing Eyes That Bind and yesterday I found a terrible mistake. I wrote two dinner scenes in a row. I'm in the process of taking one of the dinners and turning it into breakfast, but then there's the other breakfast to deal with. Ugh. I was really freaked out about this yesterday but I'm a bit calmer today, thank goodness. And yes, it may be strange for a book, but most of my dialogue happens between the characters when they're having their meals. So I keep track of things by which meal we just had. It's kind of interesting but I hope not too boring.

So that's what I'm up to today. More editing, and group therapy. I don't know about group today. I mean, I didn't do the homework or even think about it. But the gals in the group are all nice so at least I'll get some socializing in today. My therapist and I are working from this book on mindfulness and anxiety. Apparently most of my depression stems from my anxiety. Who knew? But since we've started I have noticed so much more when I'm anxious and how it effects me. Hmm.

Anyway, everyone have a great day, week, month -- however long it'll be before you come back to read my next post!


Monday, September 23, 2013

Fall is here, NANOWRIMO is coming soon!

Wow, I can't believe the chilly mornings and the breathable afternoons! And I'm in North Carolina where it's usually really hot around this time of year. Just doesn't feel right, but it feels good! ;-)

NANOWRIMO is starting to worry me. I've got a little over a month to come up with a new story. Should it be more in the world I've already created, or a new world? Maybe I should write it from the "bad guy" perspective this time. I dunno. I'd also considered writing erotica or maybe just an x-rated version of a story in my world I've created. Not sure how that would go over, but it would be easier than coming up with a totally different storyline and adding the x-rated stuff in. I don't know.

I'm working away on Eyes That Bind so that I'll be ready to go when Nov 1 comes, but it's so hard to edit and rewrite. I'm about half way through, and I'm already confused about what's already happened and what's to come. I guess that's why people use outlines. LOL. I'm more of a pantser myself. That's why my chapters now range from around 3,500 words per chapter to 7,800 wpc. I gotta go through and fix where the chapter breaks are, and that's going to be a pain. But such is life. At least I'm busy, right?

Check out my writer's page if you haven't already:

Take care, my friends.

Friday, September 20, 2013

You Thought You Knew Me But Then You Didn't

Ever just want to step out in front of a speeding train or jump off a tall building?

I finished writing and am one edit into my second book, Eyes That Bind. It's killing me that I've got this complete book, but I have to read it over and over again. It hurts! My inner critic hops out and spreads its wings making shade where there should be sunshine. What's the deal here? I know, the obvious answer is to hire someone to edit the book for me. That would be too easy, and expensive. My partner would never have it. She doesn't believe in my writing I think. She doesn't want me to hire someone to do the cover art either, but I just have to do that, because people do judge books by their covers! Even e-books.

So what do I do? Go out and buy a dozen donuts? Or visit the DQ? No, I think I'd prefer the speeding train right now.

Editing, Rewriting, Deleting

I'm editing again, as happens on a regular basis. You edit, you rewrite, you move scenes, change scenes, completely remove scenes, and then you have to edit again. At some point you have to stop and say enough is enough. Unfortunately, I'm not to that point yet.

Nope, I just came across a whole scene that doesn't need to be in the book. So what do they say to do? Cut it. It's your hard work, but cut it anyway. If it doesn't go with the story, take it out. Ugh! Then I have to take out all the references to that scene and make sure no one in that scene mentions it anywhere else. Ugh I say!

Wednesday, September 18, 2013


Well, survived putting Abby down. It was a horrible thing and I hate that it had to be done, but we really had no choice. George is getting used to being an only dog, but I still get out two dog biscuits when I go to treat her. It was horribly sad,  but we survived it.

On a happier note, I finished Eyes That Bind this morning! It's going to be going through edits and rewrites for the next month, and hopefully will be "on the shelves" by the end of October. Yippee! The story came to me slowly, but this is a longer book than I've written before -- it's going to be about 350 pages (paperback). At least that's what Scrivener tells me. Scrivener is my writing program and it rocks. It totally helps you keep track of what you're doing. Hmm. Not feeling very verbal just now. Words aren't coming to me now, so I'll leave you to re-reading In Your Eyes (link to the side on how to purchase) and I'll check in tomorrow when my eyes are falling out during the first edit.


Monday, September 16, 2013

Choosing Death

Hey y'all. Today, in about 45 minutes, we're going to be taking our dog Abby to the vet to have her "put down."  She isn't old or infirm or have any diseases that we know about. She's attacked our other dog, George, twice in the past several months and done real damage to her. She'll also attack the cats if she's not on a leash in the "cat part" of the house. (We have a dog zone in one room that stays closed. They come into the "cat part" of the house at night before bed. Abby sleeps in a crate.)

Anyway, Abby is fierce when she wants to be, and that isn't something that we can anticipate. We don't know when she's going to go nuts and attack George. She's done it around food, and over other things we can't identify. So it's getting scary having Abby in the house with other animals; we've talked to our vet, we've talked to an expert trainer, and both say there's nothing they can do besides let her go.

She's never been my favorite dog, and I yell at her a lot, but I don't want to have to let her go. Guilt: was there something I could have done differently? If we walked her more or spent more time socializing her would things be different?

So here I am crying at the computer writing about this while I wait for the clock to strike 5pm. My partner is down the hall petting Abby, and she said she's going to stay down there until it's time to go. I've spent time with her quite a bit today already and didn't want to go with her. I'm tired of crying. Will this end, will these feelings subside, once she's gone? I feel so guilty and low for doing such a selfish thing, but we have to protect the other pets. She could kill one of them if we weren't there to break up the fight, and boy have we broken up fights -- that led to very high vet bills.

So now there's about 30 minutes before we have to leave. I don't have a job so I've been waiting all day, waiting for the inevitable. My partner had work to keep her mind busy, but now she's down there letting it out. I can't believe we're going to kill a sweet dog like Abby, but we have to because she goes a little crazy now and then. No one else will want to take her in. What if she starts attacking people? She's afraid of other dogs usually (just not George). The no-kill shelters are all full. So we have no choice, right? Even our wonderful kind vet thinks it's time to do this. So it's the right thing to do, right?

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Whatcha Gonna Do?

I have serious depression and have since I was a young kid. Of course it's treated now with meds and all kinds of stuff (DBT--Dialectic Behavior Therapy and the like). I'm in a depression now that set in at least a year ago. I've never felt this bad for this long. I don't know what to do about it. I know I need to exercise to get the endorphins flowing but I get out of breath just putting on my jogging shoes. I know, pitiful isn't it?

I've mentioned before that I self-harm. This term includes cutting, burning, or otherwise physically harming your own body. I cut, though I haven't in months-- maybe 4 months... anyway, I have this great therapist who made me promise to call her if I'm ever going to cut. And it works. I don't want to call her, so I haven't cut. But boy is it hard not to.

I woke up this morning and started crying -- just because I don't want to live this life anymore. Those of you who've never been clinically depressed would say something like "Then change. Do something!" but that doesn't work. It almost makes me fight it more. I don't know now if that made sense. Oh, well.

I haven't smoked in 286 days. That's a new record. My lil sis smokes (outside only, of course) and at first I was a little jealous that she "got to smoke" and I wasn't allowed. But then she comes into the house after smoking and she just reeks! My gods smokers smell bad. I don't want that for sure!

I'm still in my writer's slump, which I hope doesn't effect my deadline for book 2. It's going to be so good, I can't wait for folks to read it. I just gotta get it out there! Speaking of marketing, Duolit has a great downloadable PDF file that is a weekend workshop on how to market your writing. You should check it out if you hate marketing your own work as much as I do!


Saturday, September 14, 2013

Serious Writers Block

Oh, boy. I am in a very bad space right now. I have a 250 page story written and it just needs an ending. And do I know how it ends? NO! I never dreamed past the adventures they'd have, and I've written about those already. So how did I get out of my slump last time? I'll have to go back through my blog and see what I wrote last time this happened.

Today I made cranberry scones, but I forgot to put the cranberries in, so they're plain scones. Still yummy, but no cranberries. Too bad.

Yes, this is how serious my writers block is. I'm finished now. The end.

Thursday, September 12, 2013

Signs of Life

Things are looking up! I found another twist in my story to work on, so I've been writing away. Not so sure about my Oct 31 deadline I've set for myself but we'll see! In the mean time I'll be typing my fingers away and editing until my eyes water. Such is the life of a writer. Ha ha ha.

I'll consider myself a "real writer" when I've got my second book published and on Amazon. I don't know why, but that's how it is. I'm far from being "accomplished" but who cares what other people think, right? I'm writing for myself and not anyone else. Let's try to think that anyway.

I did the dumbest thing, though. I took a couple of my first books to a locally owned and operated bookstore and asked if they'd carry my book. Sure, they said, because I'm a local author. They didn't even look at my letter of introduction to tell them about myself and my book. So they're selling it on consignment. The kicker? My letter of introduction didn't have anything in it about how to contact me. Damn! That's brilliance for you. Now I have to get business cards printed just for this! And I have to go face that woman who was so...unfriendly. Ugh!

When Is A Story Dead?

I'm trying to tie up loose ends and bring Eyes That Bind to a wonderful finish. The problem is, I don't have an ending! I'm a "pantser" i.e. I fly by the seat of my pants instead of outlining my story before I begin writing. I've tried outlining before but I ended up just writing without looking at it anyway. So what?

My story is a little complicated. It consists of military compounds, witches, and Yeti. Yes, I meant it. Yeti. But how to make the Yeti stop attacking and go home? It's a sadness I've been considering for days. I could just make it stop snowing and have them leave of their own accord because they're out of their element, but that's really lame. Crossbows to the face will kill them, but maybe the witches can get involved and do something to make them go away? Heavy sigh.

Any ideas folks? If you add a comment that has an answer to this terrible situation I'm in, I'll send you a free e-copy of the book when it's published and I'll mention your name in the Acknowledgments.

Thank you!

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

writing about lesbians - what's your audience?

I've heard many times that when you write you have to know your target audience. I don't really have a target audience. I write stories that are generally lesbian romances, so is my target audience lesbians? I've had quite a few people tell me that they really enjoyed my first published book and they weren't lesbians. Even my parents read and enjoyed it -- scary!

To tell the truth, I write for myself. If someone else decides that my books are worth reading - hooray! But that's really it. I don't write for lesbians and I don't write for straight people. I just write. I hope you're one of the folks who's enjoyed my book, lesbian or not. Feel free to leave me a comment below.

Saturday, September 7, 2013

It's Been A Long Day

Well, it was so long I didn't get around to writing this until the day after. Now I'm sleepy but I've had enough sleep. I will probably be logging into the QuitNet chat room -- it's a great way to keep quit when you've stopped smoking. I hope that everyone reading this is either a non-smoker or an ex-smoker because it is such a terrible addiction! I could list reason after reason that you should quit smoking, but I will refrain. Let me just say that I have been an ex-smoker for 278 days. Woohoo! It really is a great accomplishment and I couldn't have done it without my friends in the chat room.

Okay, down to business. Yesterday was a day from hell. Had nothing to do with quitting smoking, I'm done with that topic (ha ha ha). Yesterday I was working on my book 2 (it has a title but "book 2" is just easier to say). Anyway, I was working on book 2 from two different documents and I made a major boo boo -- I got confused about which document I was working on and had to go back to the beginning of both and re-read/edit them to get it straight. I would have been working from a printed copy and a e-copy but our printer doesn't work well enough to print all of those pages. You know how it is, I'd probably have to change the printer cartridge twice just to get through it all. So, I started from the beginning, as I said, and actually got through to chapter 15 (of 19) so that feels pretty good.

I still don't have an ending for my book, but it's coming along. I can't wait, because I've got another story already written (ending and all!) that I want to get rolling on, too. It doesn't have a title yet, but it is in the same world as the other two books. It is from a different angle though, just to keep things interesting!

Okay, I've rambled today and I apologize. Maybe I'll write more tonight. It's 7:25 am EST so my eyes are only half open. Hope you have the loveliest of days!


Thursday, September 5, 2013

A Story That Should Be Told?

I've been editing away, and remembered that someone somewhere (or maybe quite a few someones) said that you should write as long as it's a story that needs to be told. I don't know if my stories do need to be told. I mean, I love to write, and that's about it. I've created a world that I love, and characters that I love, so they are stories I need to tell I suppose.
So I've finished editing Part 1 and I'm working on Part 2. The hard thing is the ending. How do I bring it in to a close with a bang, not a whimper? Going through lots of scenarios in my head, hoping that something will come to me that really makes the book worth reading. I mean, it's already worth reading, but I want the ending to make you want to read more and at the same time bring some closure.

Okay, that's all I've got for today. Tomorrow is FRIDAY so hopefully I'll have good news for you and some details about the new book covers!



Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Wow, this is cool!

I just got through with editing my first 12 chapters -- they are part 1 of my book. I decided to take a story I wrote a while ago and write it into part 2 my book. And guess what?! I'd forgotten what I'd written. I'm being taken on a journey that I wrote myself because I don't really remember much of what I'd written. It's quite amazing really that I wrote this part of a story and it's just clicking! Woot! Woot! Yep, I'm tooting my own horn (or no one else will).

I'm also working with a woman I met on (a quitting smoking site) about marketing and getting word out there about my books. It's really great to find someone interested in becoming involved with me on my journey. I really appreciate all of your suggestions and thougts, LeeLee!

Okay, back to the book. Just wanted to say "hey" to all my readers.  More later.


Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Just keep editing; just keep editing; just keep edit-edit-edit

Rough day today. Went to DBT Group (Dialectic Behavior Therapy) today and had some realizations that I hadn't really put into cohesive thought before.

First and most important, I'd say, is that I do self-harm because I didn't get validation for my feelings as a kid, so I started hurting myself so that I would have something to show for my pain. Interesting. I was neglected as a kid, and this combined with genetics caused me to be depressed from a very young age. I remember wanting to get away from people and just be alone as far back as kindergarten. And that's about how old I was when I remember starting to feel guilty and I have definite memories of feeling ashamed then, too. I thought for a long time that I had missed out on some mass punishment that everyone in my school got but me. So there was that hanging over my head for a long time -- obviously since I remember it so clearly.

Anyway, enough about my sad childhood. I'm through Chapter 10 in my editing process, WOO HOO! I can't wait to get together with my graphic artist and start working on book covers! It's going to be so wonderful to have a really great book cover. It's so important, and yet when I produced my first book I went about it pretty non-chalantly. Sorry I don't know how to spell that. I made up my own cover first time around with a photo that I took myself. I hope that the next printing of my first book is much more relevant and catchy.

Okay, back to the editing. I hope this post was worth reading. Especially for everyone out there that does self-harm. You're not alone. You can email me to chat about it if you like. And of course I welcome any comments you might have.

Thanks for reading!

Monday, September 2, 2013

I'm Sick of Editing!!

Okay, I'm in the middle of Chapter 9 of Eyes That Bind and I'm so sick of it! I just can't do it anymore, so I'm taking a break to write here. ...Okay, now it's an hour later because I went and took a nap instead of any writing at all. I'm a bit refreshed, so let's see what I have to say today.

I'm getting a professional to do my book covers for the three (possibly four) books in the Eyes of the Witch series. So that means that my current paperback will have a new cover in a few months, if I can keep focused and work with the artist. I'm excited to see what he comes up with! I'll be sure to share proofs with ya'll and let you give your opinions on the artwork.

A really hard thing right now is that I can't work out, hence I continue to be bigger than I'd like to be. There, wasn't that a nice way of saying that I FEEL FAT. But I've got these sore toes, they hurt when I walk and when I'm still. It's been two months like this so I've been very sedentary. I guess tomorrow I'm going to see a doctor. I feel silly going to the doctor and saying that my toes hurt, but they do! Maybe they'll just tape them together, or maybe they'll give me a toe splint? I don't know! It's weird!

Enough exclamation points. I'm going to the Home Depot now to shop for leveling cement. I know, that's weird too. But our hallway has these dips in them and we are going to fix it up and put in laminate flooring instead of ugly old carpet. That'll make the house so much nicer. And we ordered new furniture for the living room--a whole sectional sofa--so that's very exciting too (to me anyway).

More updates soon.


Sunday, September 1, 2013

It Really Is Good!

I spent hours yesterday editing Eyes That Bind, the second book in my Eyes of the Witch series. Will spend more time today. What's funny is that I've been worried that people won't like this, that it won't be read by many people. But that really doesn't matter because I'm reading it as I edit, and I like it. There are lots of places where I had to slow myself down because I was reading too fast to catch any errors. So it's good! I'm diggin it, and I hope you will too. It'll be available in October (that's the plan anyway) so check it out on my author page in Amazon:

I'm also working on finding someone to do my cover art for the whole series. In Your Eyes is going to get a makeover, so those of you who buy it before the new covers come out will have a collectors edition (LOL).

Sorry but this is so much fun! Writing and editing is work, but it's fun work. And I'm working hard these days to get back in the groove of things. To those of you in the writing profession, I tip my hat.

Namaste, everybody!